Hi everyone! As the minutes of Thanksgiving Day wind down, I wanted to quickly share with y’all some of my deepest gratitudes that fill my heart not only on this day, but every day.
First and foremost, I am grateful to be alive today, and I mean that quite literally. As you may know, I suffer from manic depressive illness, more commonly known as Bipolar II disorder. The illness often manifests itself in late teens and early 20s. It is characterized by extreme mood swing– hypomanic episodes, inevitably followed by depressive lows. One way I like to think about the illness is this: “In your darkest days, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. It is the light of an oncoming train.” Anyway, I went through a particularly bad bout of depression over the summer, which left me suicidal and ready to put an end to my inner turmoil and suffering. Thankfully, with the love of family and friends and support of my watchful therapist and psychiatrist, I was able to climb out of that deep, deep hole, and emerge scarred, but alive. I am forever indebted to these people who have saved me in my darkest moment.
What a perfect segue into my next gratitude– family! I have been blessed with the greatest, most loving and supportive family in the whole wide world. Words cannot encapsulate the amount of gratitude I owe to them… my love, my life. My parents support me and my brothers UNCONDITIONALLY in ALL we do… they have, and will always remain, my greatest rock amidst my tumultuous, tidal temperament and emotions.
And of course, I am so grateful for all of my friends, who fill my life with so much color and dimension. There was a time when I found it very difficult to open my heart to others, leaving me lonely and withdrawn. So to all my friends today– I love you, and am so lucky to have you in my life.
I am grateful to have such creative mediums of expression as dance, music and writing, to enrich my soul. Especially writing… In my darkest of days, writing has never failed to alleviate the pain, even if only slightly. Writing is the first responder to my artistic temperaments, manic moods and bouts of depression. Being able to express through words, with the blood and tears of my soul serving as ink for a never-ending scroll of heavenly paper, has been one of God’s greatest gifts to me.
On that note, three minutes to midnight, I shall end this post. I wish you all the happiest of Thanksgivings!
P.S.– I MADE A YOUTUBE CHANNEL! Do check out my first video, fittingly themed for this special holiday. I basically discuss everything I’ve mentioned in this blog post, except in video form! More on why I decided to start a YT channel / future video ideas, at a later date.